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Discipline - Part three - Following Instructions

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Here are some clear guidelines for teaching your child to follow instructions.

Following instructions - Part three
The first core skill is “Following Instructions.” Teach your child the following three parts to following instructions:
1.   Look at the person.
2.   Acknowledge the instruction, say “OK.”
3.   Do it right away.

The following guidelines should help you get started:

Be clear with your child about what you are doing. You might say, “Cassie, I am going teach you about how to follow instructions. I have three steps to remember, listen because I want you to say them back to me.”
Once he or she can say them to you in order, start to practice. Ask your child to look at you (asking for eye contact) and then ask her to do something simple. Wait for her to respond with “OK,” and watch her go off to do it (right away).
If she forgets a step, prompt her with the right words and go on. This can be fun. Ask her to get your slippers and put one on your head.
Later when a real-life situation arises that requires your child to follow instructions, before giving the instruction, ask your child if he remembers the steps of following instructions. Review, if needed.
Two things to keep in mind regarding eye contact. In order to have eye contact when giving instructions, you need to be in the same room with your child. (Obvious, I know.) The days of yelling from another room are over. Also, you will need to think twice before giving instructions. Be sure that you really need her to do the task before giving the instructions. Too many instructions (unnecessary ones) can be counterproductive.
Acknowledging with an “Okay” assures you that your child has heard you.
Doing the task right away, avoids the child not obeying because they forgot the request.
While you are instilling this core skill, you do not need to think about consequences. The assumption is that your child needs ample practice recalling and doing the skill. Simply having her recall the steps to you out loud is a sufficient consequence in the beginning.
After lots of instruction, you may feel that your child is acting out of defiance. At this point, you need to start collecting ideas from friends and professionals about logical consequences. (Accepting those consequences is the fourth skill.)